The wellness fads we swear by—and eventually abandon

I stood opposite a colleague as she told me about her latest discovery that would permanently cure her forgetfulness. Coincidentally, I had gone to her desk to remind her about something she had forgotten.

Over the years we have been both friends and colleagues, I have come to understand that her forgetfulness is something I have to live with. You know that friend you have to set reminders for—to pack that blue scarf, for instance, because otherwise they will completely forget it was part of the dress code for the high tea you are both attending? Being a good friend means accepting your friends as they are. I have long made peace with her forgetfulness.

Her discovery made me curious, though. I mean, I do not love her any less, but without the forgetfulness, our friendship could only be better! I listened as she read out a Mongolian-sounding word. She said it was an herb, and if she takes it consistently, her memory would become sharp. I burst out laughing and expected her to join in the laughter because that was supposed to be a joke. She did not join in my laughter. When I calmed down, she told me about testimonials she had read about the herb on social media.

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As calmly as I could, I explained to my colleague that some people have good memory, others have bad memory, and that is just it. Just as she did not take any herbs to become forgetful, she does not need to take any herbs to remember things. I even made practical recommendations—for example, setting reminders and taking note of everything she might forget. But buying expensive, suspicious herbs? Well, I can only tell my story.

In one corner of my cupboard, I have all colours of small rectangular boxes, each representing different tea flavours. Pink, purple, cream, yellow, green, brown… Each of these promised to cure cramps. One said it relaxes muscles, another promised calmness, and another swore it resolves gut issues such as bloating and constipation. I was in my "natural girl era" and had spent too much time listening to conspiracy theorists saying bad things about paracetamol. I made a decision that I was going to quit taking painkillers for menstrual pain and try out natural remedies. That is how I ended up with all those tea flavours in my cupboard.

Exercise patience

The next month, I was ready! I took a cup of one of the teas with sedative and antispasmodic properties. Later, I imagined the pain looking at the tea coming to fight it with confusion. When the pain did not budge, I took a second cup from one of the other colours. This one, according to the description on the box, had antioxidant properties. Still, the pain wasn't subsiding. I decided to exercise patience, as the Christian that I am. As I waited, I filled a hot water bottle and used it to soothe the pain.

Ladies and gentlemen, it was at this point that a quiet, small voice reminded me that I was going to find myself in excruciating pain if I did not take painkillers as prescribed by my gynaecologist.

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That voice also reminded me I had work to do, and if I allowed the pain to overpower me, I would fall behind on my deadlines. I abandoned my "natural girl ambitions" and took my prescribed painkillers. I fought the good fight, but unlike Apostle Paul in the Bible, I did not finish the race. Maybe another day, another place.

The coloured tea leaves still line a section of my cupboard, as a memorial. I suspect many of them have expired now. To this day, I stick to the doctor's instructions about managing period pain.

I hope you are beginning to understand my scepticism when my colleague told me about an herb that improves memory. Like me and my period pain, her herb prescription did not come from a doctor. But who knows, maybe the herb will work for her. If it does, I will return to swallow my words and celebrate my friend's improved memory.

The writer is the Research & Impact Editor, NMG, [email protected]